Southeastern PA

Inside the life of a child-free couple

Child-free couples

FORT WASHINGTON, Pa. - It's one of the first questions married couples get once the honeymoon's over: when are you having kids?

More frequently, the answer is never. According to Time magazine, the birthrate in the U.S. is the lowest in recorded history.

First comes love, then marriage, then the baby carriage, or so the saying goes. But the reality is, children aren't for everyone. In fact, there are a number of married couples who say they aren't having any.

Experts say for some, the economy plays a role because children are expensive. There could be career concerns, too.

Lindsay and Mike have no problem creating a dinner meal together. But procreation? Let's just say you won't find table settings for kids here.

"In my gut, I just never had that urge that feeling to be a parent," Lindsay said.

The Fort Washington couple just celebrated their 9th wedding anniversary, and they cherish their time together, without kids.

"Maybe it's selfish, but, you know, I like my time. We like doing our things," Mike said.

Both are avid golfers who love to travel.

"To just chill out and do things on our own pace is what we really enjoy about it," Lindsay said.

Judy Illingworth is a psychotherapist with St. Luke's who sees many children with depression. And a lot of those kids are depressed, she says, because their parents don't spend enough time with them.

She thinks given their lifestyle, Mike and Lindsay made a smart decision.

"Because they're actually thinking about something and not doing it impulsively because someone else thinks they should," said Dr. Illingworth.

That's not to say Lindsay didn't struggle with guilt.

"There was a time where my mom said 'I just want you to be happy' and I remember saying 'but I can't believe you', and it was just sort of in my head it all made sense and I knew that. But in your heart, you feel like I'm not doing what you're supposed to do as a daughter."

Lindsay is relieved her sister just gave birth, giving her parents the first grandchild, and Mike has a 4-year-old nephew. 

"That big family will always be there," he said.

And since they don't have kids, Mike and Lindsay are counting on their nieces and nephews to look out for them in their senior years. 

But for now, they may like to know there are groups of childless couples that meet socially. 

You can see if there's one in your area by going to and typing "childless couples" in the search bar.

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